The Spider Round My U-Bend (poem)

Wrote this for my aunt and uncle this evening, based on their (true) story. Thought I’d share it on here!

There’s a spider round my U-bend
It’s leggy, black and green
I may not be an expert
But it’s the biggest one I’ve seen

I started to call her Suzy
To make her seem less scary…
Didn’t really work though,
Not when she’s that hairy!

She’s started taking showers,
She even used my shaver.
She acts like she owns the place,
Like she’s doing US a favour

We tried to co-exist
And live happily together.
But now she’s got to go,
However cold the weather!



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