Haiku – Magic

Each stolen snowflake,
A sweet moment on the tongue
Lover’s farewell kiss

 

Ronovan blogged earlier this week about a new form of haiku and free verse, which he’s calling freku. He explains it like this:

By taking a standard poem … and then attempting to sum that poem up in the three lines of a Haiku, you have quite a challenge. It is almost like developing a proverb of an idea.

There is some more information here:Β https://ronovanwrites.wordpress.com/2015/12/08/new-form-of-haiku-poetry/

This is my attempt at this. The above haiku should be read in conjunction with the “magic” poem published earlier today – https://altheauthor.wordpress.com/2015/12/10/magic/Β . I’m fairly happy with both versions, in different ways. The poem allows more depth and narrative around the situation, and the haiku takes a snapshot of the central moment and crystallizes that.

Would love to hear any thoughts that you have on either or both poems πŸ™‚

 

Photo: flickr.com/photos/reallyterriblephotographer/4839625065

4839625065_bbca03efd9_z

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22 thoughts on “Haiku – Magic

  1. At the start of the new year, I am going to be posting short poems once a week. One of my goals is to learn how to be more precise with my words – to not waste a single one. I think your poems really illustrate that point. The second poem, the haiku, tells the same story as the original but in a few lines. I think both poems are really good, and it honestly amazes me that you could condense your poem so well!

    Liked by 1 person

      • You’re welcome.

        I follow Ronovan’s challenges too, but I haven’t actually tried one myself. For some reason, I just struggle when I try to write something with parameters (like using specific words). I have been writing a lot of haikus, however, since I wrote one in the Blogging University Writing 201 class. I don’t know what it is, but I’m a little obsessed with the form right now.

        Are your haikus posted on this blog? I would love to read them.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: RonovanWrites 74th #Weekly #Haiku #Poetry Review | ronovanwrites

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