Haiku – Cat

If you are looking for something serious or beautiful, please move along. I struggled with this prompt for some reason, until the floodgates opened in a distinctly tongue-in-cheek vein during a bout of insomnia. Apologies…

According to cops,
My house was cat-burgled… They
Stole tins of tuna

Mafia employed
“Hit-cats” to scare enemies…
Corpses left in shoe

Cat drug police swoop:
Seize illegal catnip stash.
Street value – three pounds

Cat’s time on Facebook:
Half spent playing Candy Crush;
Half on human memes

New tactic announced
In War on Dog Terrorists:
Win over humans

Cat’s search history:
Youtube vids of dumb humans,
And dumb dog snuff tapes

Cat mortician.
Sometimes buries bodies.
Sometimes doesn’t



Written for: https://haikuhorizons.wordpress.com/2016/03/27/haiku-horizons-prompt-cat/

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