Drum roll please… It’s Day 26 of your Essential Guide to Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse… Now let’s blow this thing and go home…
I will be collating the best of these guides, plus a bunch of new material, into my first self-published book… just as soon as I (a) get some sleep; (b) figure out how to do that in a way that I’m proud of…!
For now, a huge thank you to everyone for following, commenting and liking these bizarre outpourings of my brain over this past month. I hope you stay with me for whatever comes next on here. If you have any suggestions for what you want to see next (themes for mini-challenges, perhaps? random prompts? a challenge to use your favourite word in a haiku?), let me know in the comments!
It’s … Haiku of the Dead!
(Here’s an irony for you – one of the reasons I chose to write about zombies for a whole month, other than being (a) obsessed with them, and (b) the sort of person to prepare others for the horrors of what’s coming – a leader, if you will – was to make the notoriously tricky “z” post easy… and yet now I’m here, I’m running on fumes and it seems anything but easy!)
Zombie, Zack, or Zed,
Undead, Flesh Eaters, Biters…
It’s all the same thing
Post-Zed baby boom.
Zombie aphrodisiac,
Or something deeper?
(Sexy zombie girl
Unblinking eyes a-popping
Groaning just for me)
Change your perspective:
Laugh at their slapstick lumb’ring,
And their zany ways!
I have some questions:
Do teen zombies‘ voices drop,
Sprout hair, and get zits?
In 2050,
Will the survivors queue up
At the zombie zoo?
“You wrote this as part of a month-long challenge? What?!”
Throughout April, I have been taking part in the A to Z Challenge, posting six days a week to cover each letter of the alphabet… For my theme, I have gone down the well-trodden, stereotypical, bit-of-a-cliché -really path of zombie survival tips… in haiku.
There are hundreds of blogs participating – over 1700. I will be doing my best to check out as many of these as possible. You can too via this link: http://www.a-to-zchallenge.com/p/a-z-challenge-sign-up-list-2016.html
A Certain Point of View 
The final sprint and now we all collapse in relief! Great finale Al!
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Thanks Meg… pass me some of that hooch now. The good stuff 🙂
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40 year old Laphroaig? 😃
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Ooh, perfect… I just need a glass and the bottle, and a few minutes to myself 🙂
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Cheers!
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Cheers!
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Oh you excelled yourself there with ‘Z’ Al. I love the question about the teenage zombies getting zits and the haiku about the sexy girl zombie was brilliant too! Well done, you did an amazing job of this, and I have loved reading them all despite not being into all that zombie stuff!!! 🙂
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Thanks Judy! The great thing about zombies is the range of things you can project onto them, whether you’re a horror fan or not. Basically, they’re a gift for my style of my randomness! 🙂
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Well, you really made them work for you Al 🙂
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Love the Z!
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Thanks Rita ❤
I liked the fact I ended it in 2050, looking back… I hope that appeared like it was deliberate, planned, well-thought-through… truth is, it was only a last minute addition!
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Well, we’ll just say you’d been working on that ending for YEARS!
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Ha ha! Maybe in the back of my mind, on some level, that may even be true! 😀
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I’ve really enjoyed reading your Zombie survival guides. Good luck with your book! 🙂
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Thank you! I’m just glad people have enjoyed my wibbling 🙂
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I know that teen Zombies’s voices are way more monotone and annoying then before they were Zombies. Oh, and apparently they can no longer bend. Thus this lack of fluidity, is why they can’t pick their dirty underpants off the floor.
Loved your A-Z posts from beginning to end. It was easily one of the most interesting and stand out entry this year.
Well done Mr Lane, it’s been emotional. 🙂
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Aw, you’ll make a bald man blush… (that isn’t a metaphor for something rude, is it? sounds like it should be…)
Thanks Lily. I have only come to realise over this month just how many similarities there are between the reincarnation of the deceased, and the teenage among us… 🙂
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Bald man blush, isn’t that a new form of make up from Rimmel? “Bald man blush. Get the London look.”
The similarities between Zombies and teens is amazing. Seriously, it’s like living with the dead…*tumbleweed rolls across the scream* Er…I’ll stop typing shall I?
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Always leave the audience wanting more, especially if… 🙂
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Heehee, I see what you did there.
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Huge congratulations on getting here though I never really doubted you wouldn’t 😃 Can’t wait for the book.
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Thanks Richard! I’ve done the “fun” bit… now the “learn-y” bit… 🙂
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Good finish, well done. Let me know how you get on with publishing; I have half a mind to do similar with some of my limericks.
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Thanks Keith, will do. I think you should definitely go for it – your limericks are always entertaining, and people need to be entertained!
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As we say in show biz… TAKE A BOW! Cast party! Lots of bally and hooey as we remember fondly, speak of how we shall miss each other greatly and sing our favorite tunes from the show… Of course, following a day of rest, we waken the NEXT DAY, filled with anticipation of the new adventure! Here’s to a magnificent run and looking forward to whatever the muse brings. 🙂
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Party! Now, can anyone help me get this grease paint off? Hey, who’s that guy over there? He looks … ill. Hang on, is he biting people?…
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Sink your teeth right through my bones baby… I do believe that’s John ‘Cougar’ Mellencamp! He makes it hurt so good. Step this way, he’s only looking for the chicks in cheap lingerie. Here’s some cold cream, get cleaned up, we’ve got a pint or two with our names on them.
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Ha ha! Lead on ❤
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Zippity Do Dah, what a finish! Wanna go to the zombie zoo with me? I can’t wait to see your survival guide, I’m gonna need one of those!
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And perhaps copies for all your family, friends and neighbours too! (Don’t worry, I’m really not a sales-y type 🙂 )
If the zombie virus spreads to other animals, the zombie zoo could be a really bizarre place…
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Oh, no, I hadn’t thought of that! I was thinking a nice family excursion for the weekend
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Oh, I see… right, I’ve gotta shake the zombies out of my brain now!
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Well, if there are going to be zombie animals, I might have to rethink my plans 🙂
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The regular zoo sounds lovely right now!
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Just a small break now. I’ll need that book for Christmas gifts
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I’m aiming to have it ready for reading on the beach in the summer!
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Wonderful, I’ll be waiting!
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I’ve enjoyed your clever and funny posts every day this month. Great job!
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Thank you so much! I’ve enjoyed writing them too… I just wish maybe either the month, or the alphabet, was a little shorter! 🙂
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Well done, Al. Such a great series you invented and created. I have loved every installment of it!
Liesbet @ Roaming About – A Life Less Ordinary
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Thanks Liesbet… I think I’m going to miss this series 😦
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Amazing job. This whole time I’ve been thinking Z was going to be so easy for you! Your posts have been such fun to read. “Sexy zombie girl…” haha! 😀 If you find a new challenge, please share! I may be looking for one, too…
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Ha ha! I’ll let you know. Taking a little time to recharge first 🙂
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Yes – good plan!
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I can’t believe I read all 26 of these posts! I actually had a dream about haiku this morning – I was at a haiku buffet, picking out the little haiku I wanted to eat. Woke me up from a dead sleep – I’m not kidding! It’s all your fault, Al. Congrats on making it to the Zany end. I enjoyed it 😀
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Thanks Diana… Kinda gets under your skin, doesn’t it!
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You have to work pretty hard to get rid of me! 😉
I was wondering how you’d wrap up with Z…bravo! That was fun!
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It all worked out well in the end! Thanks Teresa ❤
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XO
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I’ve really enjoyed your Zombie Haikus this month! I’m looking forward to what comes next 🙂
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Thank you! At this moment in time, I literally have no idea what’s next… That’s part of the fun of it!
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Congratulations on achieving a monster of a creative splurge Al. I guess your sleep patterns will move towards normal with less Zombie influenced dreams now?
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Thanks Denis. I’ll let you know if sleep patterns normalise… Still detoxing!
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Fab theme, I’m looking forward to your book coming out 🙂
Debbie
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Thanks Debbie! 🙂
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Guess which one’s my favourite?
Yes, you got it right!
(Sexy zombie girl
Unblinking eyes a-popping
Groaning just for me)
Can’t believe my month was so crazy I hadn’t even finished reading these! Oh well, now it’s done! We’ve both finished a challenge, and I wonder what we’ll do going forwards (Yes, I just read Judy’s interview 😉 )
XO
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Ha ha! Those buzz phrases really stick in your head, don’t they!
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It may have accidentally escaped me on purpose 😉
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