Manners Maketh…

Hope this one puts a spring in your step at the start of a new week 🙂 I’ve added the audio recording here: https://audioboom.com/boos/4737400-manners

 

The dance was full and crowded
With many at the ball.
He spied her through the throng
And heard her siren call.

She’d seen him too, and thought she knew
The type of man he’d be.
Tall and dark and debonair,
Who behaved impeccably.

They met with just their fingertips;
He asked her for this dance
And led her to the dancefloor
His eyes swift-stealing a glance.

May I?” he said, and led her round
And apologised for his grace
(Specifically, the lack thereof,
And the reddening of his face)

The belle in blue was smiling too,
Never you fret, my dear
Both were manners and courtesy,
And maintained a civil veneer.

Round and round, the dance went on,
From one song to the next,
Drawing ever closer,
As the music weaved effects

Her skin was pale and perfect,
But there was fire in those eyes.
A playful smile upon those lips,
And all that that implies.

He leaned in close, drank in her scent,
And whispered in her ear
Some words I will not share with you,
But whose intentions were so clear.

He led her from the dancefloor:
They weren’t seen the rest of the day.
Manners will take you so far,
Then devil the rest of the way.

 

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Picture credit: flickr.com/photos/npmeijer/5943001077

35 thoughts on “Manners Maketh…

  1. Liked. May I suggest ‘who behaved’ rather than ‘and behaved’ as a possible change? If I may, then I will.

    I’d also like to suggest ‘effects’ instead of ‘its effect’ as it seems to me that that may be smoother.

    This is a very nice and rounded piece. I like the flow (like dancing) and the structure. There ‘may’ be a few areas where you can tighten it up (as suggested above) to make it perfecter!

    Hope you don’t mind my suggestions. Feel free to ignore them.

    Keep writing and enjoy life.

    Please say hi! To Mrs Al – she is an angel (as are all partners who put up with poets)

    G:)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you – am always open to feedback. I’ve made both of those changes. The “and/who” behaved was a bit of a toss-up, tbh, but you made your point politely :-). I think the “effects” line is probably a bit weak anyway, and would try and redraft it if so inclined, but it does flow more smoothly as you suggest.

      Surely partners are endlessly entertained by us poet-types? No “putting-up with”, surely!

      Liked by 2 people

  2. For a moment I thought you were writing about me and my love.
    You know how easy it is to glide over those parts that don’t quite match, the belle in blue, the pale and perfect skin… Why should these images stop me from imagining myself, or rather relieving the time we met? 😉
    I’m so happy to be able to read you again, even if it took me a while. Computer still not fixed and WordPress not working on tablet 😦
    XO

    Liked by 1 person

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