Welcome to Day Nine of your Essential Guide to Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse. On account of me getting completely carried away writing these at one a.m. last night, today’s will be in two parts (and I haven’t written a word for “J” yet!). Back to the script… We all know the end is coming. Well, you gotta be prepared, and you ain’t gonna have time to memorise a whole bunch of stuff when it happens.
You need a short guide to surviving the rise of the undead, covering you all the way from A to Z… You need … Haiku of the Dead!
Insanity plague:
Minds will snap at the horrors
Break in different ways
Some may go so far
As to imitate zombies.
It will not save them.
Internet all gone.
Google’s answers all switched off.
Try reading some books…
Once bitten
Immortality awaits
At what cost?
(Hollywood
Celebrities flock
To “zed” up)
Insects everywhere
Slowly turning the battle
Feeding on undead
Help win the war,
Starting in your own home:
Kill the spiders!
“You wrote this as part of a month-long challenge? What?!”
Throughout April, I will be joining the A to Z Challenge, posting six days a week to cover each letter of the alphabet… even that annoying “X”… For my theme, I have gone down the well-trodden, stereotypical, bit-of-a-cliché -really path of zombie survival tips… in haiku.
With tongue firmly in cheek, I hope you will join me for the month, and beyond 🙂
There are hundreds of blogs participating – over 1900. I will be doing my best to check out as many of these as possible. You can too via this link: http://www.a-to-zchallenge.com/p/a-z-challenge-sign-up-list-2016.html
A Certain Point of View 
I might as well just give up now, how will I survive without internet?? Great post!
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Thank you… losing the internet would be like losing a limb, for me. Even a few hours offline leaves me twitchy!
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I didn’t used to be, but now, yes!
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😀
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Will killing spiders really help in the zombie attack? Because I’m usually friendly to spiders since they kill off the worse bugs!
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It’s like Marvel’s Civil War… you gotta pick a side, and see it through! Those worse bugs are now your allies 🙂
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😂😂😂
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Internet all gone. Could anything be more dystopian?
Keith Channing A-Zing from http://keithkreates.com
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It truly would be the end times!
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I had the same horrified reaction. Internet! What do you mean no internet? Who cares about the zombies; how are we going to survive without internet????
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On the bright side, it may only be a few years until civilisation re-establishes itself… and think how amazing the broadband speed will be at that time, with fewer users!
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We have the big Cascadian earthquake threat out here and the experts say we could be isolated for months (years until everything is restored). My husband’s ONLY worry is how he’s going to access the internet 🙂
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I can sympathise… that’s where this whole dystopian vision hits a little close to present fears!
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At least, we won’t have to deal with zombies…probably…I think.
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Just “unplugged”, grumpy people, shuffling, blinking in the sunlight, having been torn away from their internet…
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Puts me in mind of a rather goofy young man, who said to me years ago, “You make me feel safe, because you are (wait for it, wait for it) A-NET! Yeah, go ahead and rip the internet away, I am safe!
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Ha ha! (Tell me that wasn’t me???)
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if I told you, I’d have to kill you
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If it was me, I think the burning shame would take care of that for you!
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Well, you can allow those cheeks to cool, this was long before you were born!
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Phew… that’s totally the sort of cheesy nonsense that I would say, but happy to be off the hook this time! 😉
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Hi Al
Love your images and lines. Like silk for the mind. “Google answers all switched off.” What a lovely thought. Keep them coming.
Best Wishes
Jo-Ann
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I’ll try to! Thanks Jo-Ann x
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I killed a spider yesterday! That’s one step closer to winning the war.One down, a mega zillion to go!
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That’s how we’ll beat them, one spindly arachnid at a time. One day this war will be over…
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I am DOOMED!! Being far too much of a wimp to kill spiders, I just shriek my head off if I see one (only if it is big, though, as in bigger than a 5p piece)!
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(in Scottish accent) We’re all doomed!
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HAHA! Can’t remember the character’s name, was it Frazer from Dad’s Army?
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Think so! 🙂
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Internet being gone would be worse than insects everywhere…LOL!
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Yeah, that one’s hitting a lot of people today! “Zombies are one thing, but no internet you say? Madness!”
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