Welcome to Day Twenty (!) of your Essential Guide to Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse… It’s … Haiku of the Dead!
Today is the day,
Tame your terror and believe
That this is your day
Trust in your new tribe
And remain true to yourself:
These will carry you
Once a friend has turned
(Died and reanimated)
Put aside feelings
Whether it’s your wife,
Best friend or even your mum,
Just kill them quickly
No coursework papers,
Exam qualifications.
Life now is the test
See the twitter fools
Tweeting the apocalypse
Then going offline…
Sorry to be crude,
But some people die naked…
Tits, twinks, and todgers!
“You wrote this as part of a month-long challenge? What?!”
Throughout April, I will be joining the A to Z Challenge, posting six days a week to cover each letter of the alphabet… even that annoying “X”… For my theme, I have gone down the well-trodden, stereotypical, bit-of-a-cliché -really path of zombie survival tips… in haiku.
With tongue firmly in cheek, I hope you will join me for the month, and beyond 🙂
There are hundreds of blogs participating – over 1700. I will be doing my best to check out as many of these as possible. You can too via this link: http://www.a-to-zchallenge.com/p/a-z-challenge-sign-up-list-2016.html
A Certain Point of View 
I’ve never heard 2 of those 3 terms for body parts! 😃 I love England!
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Yes, it does leave room for interpretation! Gotta love it…
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So funny! 😂
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Twink may be slightly made-up … Came out of a conversation with a mummy friend about how there were no child-friendly, non-gynaecological equivalents of “willy” for girls…
Todger has a long and rich history though!
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Hilarious!
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LOL! I must second what Meg said!
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I’m like a cultural liaison!
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😄
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Well, I have to caution, to take care, as eating ANYTHING too quickly can leave one with a case of indigestion. And I would imagine that even the Zombies would run away… run away… should I be on the menu, naked.
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Zombies are better than people in many ways. They won’t judge you. They won’t lie to you. They will treat all the same.
They won’t even wonder why you’ve suddenly undressed…
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Great, now I have visions of Zombies laughing their faces off as I run away, naked!
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I’m thinking I need a dress code for this blog…
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Yes, modesty must prevail!
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AWESOME modesty, especially
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I can’t believe how I look forward to these each morning. Oh my, have to chuckle, they’re Terrific!
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Thanks! Although I am annoyed at myself for missing out “toilet”. I think I’m going to have to write an extra post… 🙂
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Ha ha. A tragic oversight.
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Hah, hah, had to use my online dictionary today. Always feel better about the time I spend blogging when I learn something new. Funny, Al.
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Hmm that wasn’t quite how I meant it…!
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Well, now I’m confused…
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Well, basically I used a word similar to one which I had previously used for “lady’s downstairs parts”, and it seems to have an entirely different meaning relating to gay men, that I had been unaware of until today. Note to self – when making up words, run a quick google check before posting them! 🙂
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Oh, I see! Ah, well, you remember me using French incorrectly in my limerick. Sad that we can’t know everything 🙂 I know you didn’t mean to offend anyone —
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Well, unless people would be offended by me using a silly synonym for vagina… those people probably shouldn’t stick around on my blog anyway! (Although I tend to be more scatalogical than biological with my language 🙂 )
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I don’t think so! As for scatological, if you have children or pets, you’re usually okay 🙂 (please stop making me look up words)
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Sorry… if I use a big word, more often than not it’s a substitute for “poo”!
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Thanks for the edification!
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(I just had to google that…) 🙂
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Stop it! You’re worse than my brothers 🙂
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I’m the eldest of four boys, and the father of two boys… it’s kind of in the blood! Or, it’s an innate and ineradicable hereditary trait, in the long version 🙂
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Stop it now! Boys will be boys 🙂
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😀
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You’ve got me smiling here, Al. ‘Twink’ is a term used in the gay world to describe a certain gay male between the age of 20 and 30. I’ll say no more about it apart from it made for some very interesting reading in that last line of yours.
However, there are gay zombies aren’t there, so I guess there will be some gay twink zombies? 😀
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Zombies are all about equality, so that would work! (It wasn’t how I meant it, but every day’s a school day 🙂 )
Would those be the ones carrying the motorbike helmets, without a motorbike??
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lol, not quite, but I’ll explain all when we come face to face one day 😀
Are you coming to the Bloggers Bash?
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Well done Al! I had not heard of ‘twink’, but I do love a todger!
I must get Hugh to tell me about twinks as I am curious to know now! 🙂
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Sadly not – I’ll be at the Isle of Wight festival, listening to hip new acts… Like Queen, The Who, and Adam Ant!
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😎Have a great time. Hope you can make next year’s Bash.
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Cheers Hugh. I hope to. Gutted I can’t make it this year!
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So cold, so heartless
So petty and judgmental
Death will take you, too.
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Are you available for children’s parties?
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As what? A Zombie piñata?
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Tits, twinks and todgers. Sounds like a Friday night down London.
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I’m too old for all that… Eeh me party days are behind me
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Hahahahahhaaa… Loved it 😀 Thanks for the chuckle! And kudos for staying on track with the Challenge; surviving the zombie apocalypse might be cliché, but in haiku puts you at a whole new level 😀
Guilie @ Life In Dogs (and member of co-host Damyanti’s team, D’s Company )
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Yeah, why only do one difficult challenge when you can make it even harder on yourself! Thanks Guilie 🙂
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survival is essential 🙂 If you enjoy reading zombie shorts I welcome you to my site and encourage feed back on my first zombie short
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Thank you – will check it out 🙂
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great idea for a theme and thanks for popping around to Beyond the Flow. I wonder if my dead poets could well be your zombie apocalypse, especially Shakespeare who’s head was stolen by grave robbers. By the way, Shelley’s heart didn’t burn when he was cremated and his wife kept it in a drawer until her death. Truth can be stranger than fiction! xx Rowena
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Thanks Rowena – some truly bizarre truths there! I didn’t know that about either Shakespeare or Shelley… wonder if that might inspire some fiction… 🙂
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